The Perfect Husband

uismaeanx
June 18, 2009

 

Golfers

From a reader:

Several men are in the locker room of a golf club. A cell phone on a bench rings and a man engages the hands-free speaker- function and begins to talk. Everyone else in the room stops to listen.

MAN: “Hello”
WOMAN: “Honey, it’s me. Are you at the club?”
MAN: “Yes.”
WOMAN: “I’m at the mall now and found this beautiful leather coat. It’s only $1,000. Is it OK if I buy it?”
MAN: “Sure, go ahead if you like it that much.”
WOMAN: “I also stopped by the Mercedes dealership and saw the new 2009 models. I saw one I really liked.”
MAN: “How much?”
WOMAN: “$65,000.”
MAN: “OK, but for that price I want it with all the options.”
WOMAN: “Great! Oh, and one more thing. The house we wanted last year is back on the market. They’re asking $950,000.”
MAN: “Well, then go ahead and give them an offer, but just offer $900,000.”
WOMAN: “OK. I’ll see you later! I love you!”
MAN: “Bye, I love you, too.”


The man hangs up. The other men in the locker room are looking at him in astonishment.

Then he smiles and asks: “Anyone know whose phone this is?”

Recent Posts

The Valencia’s Take Paris

Something I swear by is that no one throws a party quite like Lisa Helfend Meyer. Her parties were always over the top. The ones at hotels and restaurants and the ones at her incredible home all...

Back In The Saddle

It is nice to be back in the saddle again, for almost one year DESPERATEEXES.com was flat on our backs! Was it that Sanskirt stuff called Karma? Nope, it was in fact two F*&Kers. For many years...

Miss Elizabeth Taylor

Elizabeth Taylor is gone. I had the opportunity to have a few dealings with Miss Taylor and it was odd in so many ways. Odd in so much what was I doing talking with, visiting in her bedroom, and...

ADT Answers the Alarm Bell

What alarm system? ADT/TYCO and John J. Nazarian went to battle and I have to say, when these guys screw something up they fix it! Only if you have the ability to track down MR. BIG and talk to...