We could all use a laugh…

uismaeanx
February 5, 2010

Gotta love these!

I went to an extremely attractive female doctor today for my
annual checkup. She told me that I had to quit masturbating. I asked
why and she said, “Because . . . I’m trying to examine you.”

When I was a kid, I used to pray every night for a new bike. Then
I realized that God doesn’t work that way.. So I stole a bike and
asked Him to forgive me.

Recent Posts

The Valencia’s Take Paris

Something I swear by is that no one throws a party quite like Lisa Helfend Meyer. Her parties were always over the top. The ones at hotels and restaurants and the ones at her incredible home all...

Back In The Saddle

It is nice to be back in the saddle again, for almost one year DESPERATEEXES.com was flat on our backs! Was it that Sanskirt stuff called Karma? Nope, it was in fact two F*&Kers. For many years...

Miss Elizabeth Taylor

Elizabeth Taylor is gone. I had the opportunity to have a few dealings with Miss Taylor and it was odd in so many ways. Odd in so much what was I doing talking with, visiting in her bedroom, and...

ADT Answers the Alarm Bell

What alarm system? ADT/TYCO and John J. Nazarian went to battle and I have to say, when these guys screw something up they fix it! Only if you have the ability to track down MR. BIG and talk to...