Shaved Nuts

John J. Nazarian
November 7, 2007

NutsThere is no question in anyone’s mind that had I not been a cop, I would have been a chef…..yes folks, I would have had a great place for eats! I still fantasize about parking my Rolls in front of my Pizza Jointyou know, BIG pizza just like when I was a kid growing up in Boston. And remember, too much cheese is not a good pizza! Rich of Mulberry Street in Beverly Hills makes a good pie, but mine would be better, and someplace back east…

Now for Shaved Nuts, this is not an epicurean delight but a 50 year old dip shit who shows up at his wife of 15 years bedside and drops his drawers and says “whadaya think?” My clients first response is who did that to you? I can only guess that was more important at the time than why? Now, having been a cop in San Francisco, I have seen a lot of shaved nuts. SF is a great little town but there are l lot of gay guys who like to shave their privates, it is sexy, I guess, and can make the equipment look larger…LOL, that is what I have been told! Now my client tells me that this guy is not gay and I wonder, Oh, goodI am still wondering whether my client is being straight with me!

When your husband or soon to be X shows up with shaved nuts, yes, I think that may be a new chapter in what was already a bad situation. Now if your relationship is good, and sex is just like in the movies, and this is a new discovery I guess could be jazzing things up, or some TV shrink is telling you how good it should be, well then go the other way!

But this guy with the smoothie was giving his wife numerous clues, and she like soooo many others was not receptive to them. And wanted to have more proof, more and more, not wanting to deal with the fact that her husband had gone to the other side. Dont ignore the BIG clues: the boxers becoming briefs, the fancy sports car, the cologne change. In the case of Shaved Nuts I was right again, it was another male and a young one at that, all right maybe he is bisexual. My client was devastated that it was not another woman but a young man. The Other Woman syndrome would have been easier on everyonefor me it made no difference, cheating is cheating and life will go on!

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