Beware of Very, Very Personal Trainers

uismaeanx
August 6, 2008

Personal Trainer/Gigolo?Do you know the difference between a personal trainer and bullshit? The smell! This is a warning especially for my female readers: personal trainers are often little more than buff losers and leeches that will suck your financial juices dry…if you are not careful!

Over the years I have had dozens of cases where clients have told me of being taken advantage of by personal trainers. When women are going through a divorce, their self esteem is in the shitter. So for many years of being told how “fat” they are, one of the things they do is to go and check out some gyms…and that is when the swoop takes place. Most of these characters are very chatty and quick with the compliments, and many are well built and also handsome…hey if you got it, use it and these gym rats do!

Next thing you are paying them $50.00 to $75.00 per hour, and the compliments keep coming and you are feeling great. A man is touching you and making your feel like you are special ($50 to $75 per hour special). and most of all someone is paying attention to you! Almost like your hairstylist…except I have never had anyone come to me and tell me that they bought a condo with their hair stylist or have given them a car and large sums of cash (oops, I forgot Barbra Streisand…but you get my point!). One of our clients “invested” in a condo, and when she came home early one day she found Da Trainer with a young girl with an ass much smaller and tighter than hers doing the “bump” on her 600 thread-count sheets. And then she had to fight to get him out as she had put shit-for-brains on the title! All the “self esteem” these jerks can bring to you is going to cost you something so do it with a smile or realize what you are doing before you do it…as you are not the only one he is “training.” I have a trainer, sure do for CharLee my doberman and we teach CharLee tricks just like your trainer will teach you if you are not careful! Many of these guys have criminal pasts or backgrounds in hustling. They do this type of work because they like training themselves and it requires no real governmental scrutiny to wear a T-shirt with Personal Trainer on it. And they talk about the membership in this organization or that but it means nothing. Ladies be very careful. Just keep in mind that you are vulnerable to anyone who is being nice to you and these guys can get real close…if you know what I mean. Just realize also that if you want to pay that is fine, but do not give what you cannot afford to lose!

I remember last year I was at the gym that I go to and there were all of these people showing up and I asked what was it all about? I was told that they were going to get “certified” as personal trainers. Too Fn funny, some of these ninnies I had seen bumping around the gym would not know how to operate the shower, never mind “training” someone. However, there you have it…personal trainers…you could be a convicted rapist and be a “Personal Trainer”…how about that?

Again girls, you are very vulnerable at this time, so do not enter into any business dealing with any quick-talking, good-looking guys you meet at the gym. Here try this, when you look at this guy talking to you, squint your eyes and listen closely and I swear you will see a Loser, whose sole purpose in life is to get his car or his rent paid for the next month!

Note: I am sure that their are some legit people hanging around these gyms, I just have not met too many, and I am always watching and listening — after all, it is what I do.

Recent Posts

The Valencia’s Take Paris

Something I swear by is that no one throws a party quite like Lisa Helfend Meyer. Her parties were always over the top. The ones at hotels and restaurants and the ones at her incredible home all...

Back In The Saddle

It is nice to be back in the saddle again, for almost one year DESPERATEEXES.com was flat on our backs! Was it that Sanskirt stuff called Karma? Nope, it was in fact two F*&Kers. For many years...

Miss Elizabeth Taylor

Elizabeth Taylor is gone. I had the opportunity to have a few dealings with Miss Taylor and it was odd in so many ways. Odd in so much what was I doing talking with, visiting in her bedroom, and...

ADT Answers the Alarm Bell

What alarm system? ADT/TYCO and John J. Nazarian went to battle and I have to say, when these guys screw something up they fix it! Only if you have the ability to track down MR. BIG and talk to...