Paying for it

John J. Nazarian
December 9, 2007

Paying for itOK, time to give the “sperm donors” a break! What is it with these rich guys — and a couple of not so rich ones — that fall in love with their “paid date,” “escort,” “woman of the night”…HOOKERS! When I was a cop, I never arrested any girls for prostitution. Sometimes I had to arrest them for other things, but never for “working.” I like hookers…I find them often very smart and interesting, and hell, some do have things to sell (hmmm, did I just admit to something here?)!

But hey guys, what are you thinking of when you marry one of these girls? Is it Love? or Lust? and why not just keep paying for her (and in some cases, him!)! Let’s just keep everything in perspective. Remember my old friend, Liberace? Look, I think that all of this is fine, but stop being surprised when it just does not work. My father always told me, “Nothing is for free”, and that is right up there with “No good deed goes unpunished.” As I always tell my male clients who are thinking of getting married, look at a divorce and see what it is going to cost you! I promise you that when you figure out lawyers’ fees (yours and hers), support, and all the rest, you could have slept with a porno star 3-4 times a week during your so-called marriage!

As one former client and former “lady of the night” told me, “Hmmmm, it was a great port while it lasted!” And another one once said to me, ” this has been the longest call,”…she was describing her marriage of 12 years. Sure, she loved you at one time…hell that was what you paid for, love by the hour! And in this case you will pay just as dearly, and when your lawyer tries to tell the court that she was a “hooker”….NO ONE IS GOING TO CARE! One of my clients who had this background is a very nice person with issues, and those issues are that she likes money and the things it can buy…who doesn’t? She is now going to lose a little weight and start hunting again…remember what I have said, women do get better with age! Even old hookers!

Recently I was advised by one of my sons (the one in college, but I think he’s learning just as much from my cases!) who asked me, “Do you know why you pay a hooker?” I looked at him with a confused look and he said, “To leave!” You know what, he is right. And when you marry a girl with a background like this, be prepared, because when she leaves she will need a new place to live, and you’ll be paying for it! Isn’t this fun?!

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