Jun
18
From a reader:
Several men are in the locker room of a golf club. A cell phone on a bench rings and a man engages the hands-free speaker- function and begins to talk. Everyone else in the room stops to listen.
MAN: “Hello”
WOMAN: “Honey, it’s me. Are you at the […]
Apr
11
One of my best friends and confidants fancies himself an up and coming comic…he is funny unless you are looking at him down the barrel of a 9mm. He told me this joke about Octomom:
“This could be a new menu item at coffee shops around the country, The Octomom — 8 eggs, no […]
Feb
13
Madonna…What a friend she has in Jesus Luz!
Filed Under Moving On, Relationships, Humor | 1 Comment
Hey now, this is a Valentine’s story for you, in place of going out and blowing a wad on roses or candy (Sees is my favorite and I also do love roses). Really, who can afford all this stuff in these tough financial times…roses, candy, dinner and “toys”? Madonna, that is who! Have you all […]
Jan
22
Time for a laugh
Filed Under Humor | Leave a Comment
A good one from a reader…
Dear Wife:
I’m writing you this letter to tell you that I’m leaving you for good. I’ve been a good man to you for seven years and I have nothing to show for it. These last two weeks have been hell. Your boss called to tell me that you had quit your job today and […]
Dec
11
sent from a reader with the right attitude:
‘Whatever you give a woman, she will make greater.
If you give her sperm, she’ll give you a baby.
If you give her a house, she’ll give you a home.
If you give her groceries, she’ll give you a meal.
If you give her a smile, she’ll give you her heart.
She […]
Jul
29
May I approach the Bench about the bench?
Filed Under Judges, Humor | Leave a Comment
No wonder I am becoming a little cranky, I roam from court to court and the benches are not meant for comfort….why is that? The judges look comfortable, and the bailiff with his or her coffee looks very comfortable, and the court staff all look very content on their cushions. The court reporter always […]
Mar
4
“The Longest Call”…and the answer
Filed Under Humor | Leave a Comment
Recently a very well-known lawyer in the Bay Area told me that he had a client who was a very high-end call girl who somehow married one of her clients. We have had a couple of these cases also, and they are never boring. You know, once a “hooker”…hmmmm, that is a tough […]
Nov
12
The sweet smell of revenge
Filed Under Revenge, Divorce, Humor | 5 Comments
After 17 years of marriage, a man dumped his wife for his young secretary…hmmm, is any of this sounding familiar?
His new girlfriend demanded that she wanted to live in the couple’s multimillion dollar home, and since the man’s lawyers were a little better, he prevailed. Again, having the right lawyer — and of […]
Nov
7
Shaved Nuts
Filed Under Infidelity, Humor | Leave a Comment
There is no question in anyone’s mind that had I not been a cop, I would have been a chef…..yes folks, I would have had a great place for “eats!” I still fantasize about parking my Rolls in front of my Pizza Joint…you know, BIG pizza just like when I was a kid […]
Nov
5
Out with the Tide
Filed Under Humor | 4 Comments
Dear TIDE,
I am writing to say what an excellent product you have, I have used it since I was married, when my mom told me it was the best. Now that I am older and going through menopause, I find it even better!
About a month ago I spilled some red wine […]