Recently we received a comment as to the qualifications and most important of all ‘the temperament’ of MONITORS. Or more appropriately, Certified Visitation Monitors, these are the people who the court will order and or appoint to watch and take notes of your visits with your children. Sounds simple and easy right? Wrong!
I have to agree with everything John is saying. Phyllis Block of Kidz-First Parental Monitoring Service is the most unprofessional, two faced person I’ve ever met. My situation required a monitor to watch my husband during his visits, who was abusive and already once took my child away from me without telling me. Phyllis was constantly at odds with our scheduled arrangement and locations, always inputting her preferences and changing plans to best suit her and my ex even if it meant my child and I had to completely change our schedules in order to accommodate them. She couldn’t keep track of any plans as well and I had to constantly follow up with her. I knew things were going bad quickly when she started insinuating that I wasn’t caring for my child well enough. Most shocking was when it came time to report on the visits, she was completely biased toward my ex, there were huge mistakes and little facts as to what took place during the visits, rather her opinions were clearly made throughout. I have come to agree that monitors are a total scam and a joke, a few hours of training and they can throw a wrench into a family law issue.
Since my first articles several months ago, I have had an incredible education on the work these people do and the hazards that go along with the job. On both sides!
It maybe a great idea to come across as an old calloused jerk. This method works well for a few, sure be disagreeable, make comments that can put one side or the other into a state of wonderment. We all know, it is almost like the ‘bogeyman’ what is he or she going to do, what will they write in their reports……scary!
Well the report is very important and should be done the same day as the visit. Not days later if at all….. some of these agencies employees do not exactly have the English vernacular mastered and being a former cop means absolutely NOTHING! For others they are just old and cantankerous and enjoy being just a ruthless pain in the ass.
Some agencies, the owners and employees are younger and understand how children and parents should interact. Lets just say that some have a more ‘fresh’ and a sense of reasons than some…..as I always said, ‘for me it was having some common sense’ that made me a good cop. It is not the job of the monitor to play head games with you and some do, I am thinking to make you fear getting rid of them.
BTW, getting rid of some these people once they are attached is sometimes not easy.
Some lawyers will just stop the visits, and try to negotiate with the other side to try someone new. And just like anyone coming into your life, these CVM’s have a purpose and a place and you need to be cautious, I agree, these ‘bit’ players can have a catastrophic affect on your divorce and your life!
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©Straight Talk with John J. Nazarian, Private Investigator
July 24, 2013
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