Elvira, bank account’s on fire

John Schneider may be facing jail time if he doesn’t pay up.” One word comes to mind, BULLSHIT. I have been banging around this town, and these courts, in Los Angeles for 25 years. I have seen no one go to jail for not paying up on cases like this. Zero. Zilch. Nada. Frankly, it is great publicity for the those involved. Schneider, whose career is hanging on still from the days of the “Dukes of Hazzard.” It is reported that John is working out in his studio, trying to make “it” happen again. Good luck.

I have seen doctors, lawyers, and all kinds of celebrities go to DIVORCE court and lie their asses off, and nothing but stern looks and threats from the bench is pretty much it. Everyone lies and cheats in court, or at least tries to, and DIVORCE court is the best of the best. Once in a while, you will see “sanctions.” Big deal. That too often has the same effect of winning your small claims action or a big dollar amount in a court action. Great, Super, Wonderful, Fantastic…..go and collect it, just be sure to get a big barrel of sand to pound! Now when there are assets, a judge can order those assets sold to pay for all kinds of stuff. However, when there is nothing that can be sold or attached, good luck sweetie. You likely spent more on the “win” then you will ever collect from your X husband.

Fish heads, fish heads
Roly-poly fish heads

In this case, John Schneider is paying the former love of his life $18,911.00 per month in support. Now, unless big bucks are coming consistently, that is a ton of money to give to the old lady every month. It is reported that he owes $185,000.00 in unpaid support. That, too, is a ton of moolah for anyone. Keep in mind; this was a divorce filed in 2014 and John is 57 years old. This is like a ring of dead unsalted fish rotting around your neck, and every time you look, more dead fish are being added to it, and the stink gets worse.

John gave an interview in 2015 with “Closer Weekly” in which he speaks about how after separating that he and Elvira were going try and do good by each other. “Elly and I want to prove you can be great DIVORCED parents. Our conversations are friendly again, and we are laughing. It is the right thing for us to do, without question.” Flash forward three years (2018), and that damn reality has kicked someone in the head. “Where is my money?” is one of those realities. The other big ass kicker is that “Elvira” wants that former “Good O’L Boy” to pay for her legal fees! That is the “Trifecta” of kicking a guy in the nuts. Pay-up on current, pay up on back support, and pay my F’n lawyer too! John lives in Louisiana, and he might want to check out Belize!

It was reported that John made $805,000 between January 2016 to August 2017.Nice chunk of cash. Now the question is, where is he hiding it? Keep in mind the IRS gets a chunk, and agents and the others. So he made some good cash but had to pay out a lump. Not just to “Elvira,” but everyone.

There is not a question in my mind that John is having some issues. This stuff can kill a guy, and no one wants that to happen. When I look at the photos of John Schneider, I look at how he dresses, and I see problems that I would use to knock him out of being a juror or choose to be one. In almost all his photos his shoes look like he was digging ditches before putting them on.

Say what you will, I have assisted in jury selection over the years, and it is the little things I look at, not just one thing but several things. This is just one of the things that caught my eye. Talking of eyes, his “glance” is also off. Again, it is the total package. John Schneider needs to get his lawyer to do a new I & E and get the “payout” number to be real,.But going to jail? Not going to happen. John, I am here just to observe. Here is some of my famous free advice. Maybe find a Persian “male” living in Beverly Hills and take some notes from him as to how he did his DIVORCE and be sure to ask about the famous “Persian Two Step”…………

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By John Nazarian
©Straight Talk with John J. Nazarian, Private Investigator
February 23, 2018
All Rights Reserved, do not reproduce in whole or in part without the express written consent of the author

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