The Ted Baxter of the Courtroom

Douglas A. Bagby, I have never heard of this guy till today! Mr. Bagby was doing divorce battle with none other than Michael Trope of Trope and DeCarolis. This was taking place in Judge Rudy Diaz’s courtroom, Dept. 83.

When I walked in there was Mr. Bagby doing what only could be called an oration of sorts. One thing I noticed was that his suit was a nice cut and fit him well, it had to be tailored. Sitting next to him was his client, and forgive me here folks but she looked like a horse that had been ridden hard and put away wet! I am not sure if she may have had a recent surgery and was sitting on the “place” that was worked on but she kept a face that had the appearance of a stroke victim, it was just terrible (I was going to ask the bailiff if an ambulance should be called, until she got up and walked to the stand). She looked pained and anguished as perhaps she should be using a stool softener.

Well back to Bagby, he just went on and on, Judge Diaz was developing a pained look on his own face and just kept his head lowered as if to be praying that Bagby would just sit down and shut up! Mr. Bagby was very entertaining, if you listen to him he has a great presentation until you realize he is “shoveling” it as fast and furious as he can. And if you listen closer you will ask yourself, “what did he say?” How many of you remember Ted Baxter on the Mary Tyler Moore Show, he is alive and well living in the body of Douglas A. Bagby, Esq. Someone should grab this guy for Dancing with the Stars, for sure, he does a great soft shoe and moves into a great tap dance and if that all fails hold on for the Fox Trot. This guy is good, just like Ted Baxter.

All of a sudden Judge Diaz rules against Mr. Bagby and DABs did something I have never seen or heard any divorce lawyer do. Within seconds of having the judge rule against him, Mr. Bagby goes into an incredible mini oration as to “when do I get some money over here”…shit he just morphed into Archie Bunker! For sure he tried to force Judge Diaz in giving an order for funds, let’s see back in March of 2010 he asked for $200,000 based on a potential $70,000 bill and was given $25,000…( remember the nice suit ) Judge Diaz was not going for it back in March and I am betting he won’t be going for it today either. Mr. Bagby stated that he had a “Substitute of Attorney” form ready and waiting as he looked around the courtroom for someone to pass the form to. He was backing doing a soft shoe and ready to let a rhumba loose. Judge Diaz told him, “we are in a middle of a hearing”…DABs comes back and states, “this is going to cost me another $20,000″…he has costs and on and on he went, $100 grand? Perhaps he should begin asking at $20,000 and not wait for his bill to go to $100 grand…and he does wear a nice suit.

Pretty soon DAB’s client asked the court to clear the courtroom…LMAO, she may look like she parked her ass on a porcupine but she had us all tossed out in the hall…too late sweetie…the votes have been counted, and you lost the race.