Super Lawyers, meet Asswipes

Once again it’s “Super Lawyers” time…folks, this is so embarrassing! Embarrassing from the point that this is PAID PUBLICITY, paid for by the “Super Lawyers” themselves. Sure I have heard all about the “point system” and “input from peers,” I am just having problems telling Bullshit from Roses.

If you read this bullshit quickly you would think, “wow, these guys are really special“…about as special as having a belly button. And the photos, here is an example: that fellow sitting on the very expensive motor cycle on the front page had to have spent at least $25,000 for that picture alone, now that is super (I am not mentioning his name as he got plenty of PR from that high-paid front page placement)! And forget what those who have two page spreads had to pay, incredible only to be “Super” in their own minds. Input from peers, and 12 indicators of peer recognition and professional achievment-things like experience, verdicts,and settlements, transactions, clients, honors and awards — this was taken from “Super Lawyers” on how the “Supers” are selected…I am not buying it.

The publisher who came up with this should be considered “super” for pulling off this lucrative promotional scam on the American public. 55 regional editions from Hawaii to Maine. And it gets even better, there is Top 10 Law Schools, The Top 100, The Top 50, The Rising Stars. Well how about this, The Biggest Wallet, The Newest Rolls Royce, The Biggest Gut, The Smallest Feet, our favorites The Best Dressed, The Worst Dressed, The Worst Breath, The Biggest Ego, The Coolest Offices, and as you see this could go on and on.

This would be better titled, “Lawyers Working Close to You Who Paid to Be Called ‘Super.” “Super Lawyers” and the way it is promoted is very misleading. I know some of these lawyers, and to call them “Super” would be a little like watching a train wreck and applauding. There are some very good lawyers on the list and it is worth mentioning that the big photos are a little less this year, and I have to wonder if these lawyers are realizing how many of these ridiculous framed photos they can have in their offices at any given time? Oh that is one of the other fun things you can do if you buy one of these silly advertising gimmicks and that is having it framed and hanging in your office…problem, they are also hanging in all of the other “Super Lawyers” offices…..why? They too paid for it!

Hmm, I just had a thought, they should reach out to all of those unhappy clients who may have hired a “Super Lawyer” from this list and got hammered. We could then have the “Asswipe Awards,” and then we could see how many of those would be hanging in the offices across this city. Folks, I have looked at the list and the “Asswipe Awards” could be a money maker too, and at least it would be honest and heart-felt.

Note: “Super Lawyers” does print this: “You may wonder whether lawyers pay to be included. The simple and unequivocal answer is no. Lawyers do not and cannot pay to be included, and advertising has no bearing on the selection to the list in fact, ads are not sold until after final selections are made)”…who writes this stuff? guys in long coats, tall hats and carpet bags?

DesperateExes.com will be posting our own list of lawyers who we think are the best here in the Southern California area, based on our experience and observation, not payola. But if anyone wants to send us $25,000, we’ll be happy to post your picture, suitable for framing!