Out with the Tide

Dear TIDE,

I am writing to say what an excellent product you have, I have used it since I was married, when my mom told me it was the best. Now that I am older and going through menopause, I find it even better!

About a month ago I spilled some red wine on my new white blouse. My unfeeling husband found it a great opportunity to berate me and make fun of my being clumsy. Along with that, he took the opportunity to tell me how I do nothing right!

Well, one thing led to another, and I ended up with a lot of his blood on my new white blosue. I tried to get the stain out with a bargain detergent he had made me buy, but the stain would not come out.

I made a quick trip to the Supermarket to get a bottle of liquid TIDE with bleach. To my surprise and complete satisfaction, all of the stains came out.

In fact the stains came out so well that the police detectives who came by yesterday told me that the DNA test were negative, and my attorney said that I would no longer be considered a suspect!

I thank you so much for having such a great product. Well, gotta go, I must write a letter to the HEFTY BAG people. They also have a very good product!

Sincerely,
A menopausal wife

The above was provided to me by Carey Stanchfield; Carey is a brilliant personal assistant to a local attorney.